Part Next

So, I suppose this is a Part 2, but let’s not call it that. This is Part Next, where I tell you about the next chapter in my journey.

I moved to Seattle, I started my private counseling practice, I got engaged and I was making zero dollars and planning a self-funded wedding. Also, I just wasn’t really enjoying what I was doing. I ended up being offered a position in a vocational cosmetology school serving as their counselor/administrator. I had no idea what I was going to be doing on a day-to-day basis other than some administrative processes of the school and being available for students who were having challenges getting through school.

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[this was my office & that was my to-do list]

I don’t think it’s any surprise to you that many of the students flowing through the school had mental health issues. Vocational education seems to attract people with limited resources and hence, ongoing issues resolving their problems. It’s one of the reasons they hired me. I was essentially a human resources generalist with an amplified focus in social work. I updated the student hours against the time clock, wrote the student handbook and thus became the official handbook know-it-all, and managed all student files. I was also the person who handled when a student need a leave of absence, recommendations for in-patient rehab or when they needed additional assistance that a typical cosmetology educator did not necessarily know how to provide.

I ended up loving that job. It was the perfect mix of business and social services. I was embedded in doing good – supporting the effort to educate people and enable them to make something of their lives. I also had a level of authority and autonomy that allowed me to feel like I was contributing to the overall success of the school and of others. It felt like a broader impact than I had experienced doing one-on-one counseling and there was a measurable level of success. The goal was graduation. I could measure my contribution.

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[I also regularly got used as a model, not too shabby]

I need constant novelty to feel like I’m growing. The first year I learned the job and the second year I mastered the job. After that, there was no upward mobility and I wasn’t getting thrown into anything new and/or challenging. There were no equivalent positions available and at two years in, I realized I wanted to continue doing what I was doing, but I wanted to make it official. I wanted to get into human resources.

I started looking at jobs. I wanted to see what I would need to be an official human resources leader at a company. Turns out, my master’s degree was a great fit for entering human resources, because if we’re being honest, HR is basically counseling at work. It’s the highest level of development. You’re already working with people who are motivated to grow and change because their livelihood is at stake. You can capitalize upon the strengths of your employees and harness them for the good of a company. It’s so freaking awesome, you guys.

The only hitch was that most companies wanted a degree in HR or business, neither of which I had. I had the years of work experience and the level of education, but not educational focus most jobs required. However, there was a very amazing loophole – a Professional Human Resources certification [PHR]. Actually, I wouldn’t call it a loophole, I’d call it a great fortune. I studied for months for this exam and passed it with flying colors. I pretty much got a job offer right after I get my certification.

I’ve been working in HR for several years now and have been continually amazed at how perfect my education has been for what I do daily. My writing skills coupled with my counseling abilities have been like Batman’s utility belt for HR. I can look at an employee on a singular level, a group of employees at the team level or an organization on the systemic level. I get to look for patterns, processes & people to support, champion, improve and inspire. I can’t get bored because THERE IS SO MUCH TO DO.

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As I’m sure you can tell, I am not your normal HR person. I like to think HR can be done in a way where you are everyone’s greatest ally and champion. Is it difficult to do? Hell yeah – but so is mental health counseling. Plus, there are so many different areas of HR to tackle and become an expert in.

So, that’s where I am. I feel fulfilled by what I do and I am glad I got the education I did because I think it prepared me for my current job better than many people who get a formal education in HR.

Anyway, expect me to still share mental health stuff, but especially how the mind relates to work. I’m really into lots of different areas HR directly influences that are becoming huge in the national conversation – paid parental leave, a livable hourly wage, work-life balance, ‘Lean In’, & millennials at work. Expect me to talk about those things and so much more. I’ll continue to talk about all the things that I’m geeking out on in the hopes this remains a place to process all the ideas and things I’m learning and hopefully benefit some of you out there.

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Welcome to my life now, kids. I hope you enjoy the ride.

Dating Your Therapist

Sigh.

I love you, How I Met Your Mother. I love you so much. You make me laugh, you have Neil Patrick Harris and Jason Segel, and I can honestly relate every episode to a life circumstance. Jesse is sick of me trying to relate everything to you, but I don’t give up. I will keep talking about Interventions, Marshall and Lily’s relationship, and how to properly pronounce encyclopedia.

But I am unhappy with Season 7, which recently appeared in my Netflix (sorry to all you kiddos who are hip with Season 8). You have Robin dating her therapist!

NoOoOooooooOOoooooooooo!

Ugh, ugh, ugh, ugh! I love the actor who is playing her therapist, the plot line is cute, and I know I need to suspend reality for a moment, but seriously this drives me nuts.

I’m sure this is how any person feels when their profession is represented poorly, but it’s really hard for me because I know how stigmatized therapy can be. On top of that, having clients fall for you is not uncommon. Think about it.

You go to talk to someone about your problems, they listen to you, they understand you, maybe they are kind of attractive, and they help you through probably some of the most difficult times in your life. If you’re not prepared for this, then it might be tough for you to wrap your head around. You may have legitimate feelings for your therapist because the connection is authentic, but the relationship can’t go past professional. It just ruins everything about why therapy is great. Therapy is supposed to be a place to just let it all hang out and not get tangled up in things like romantic relationships. That’s for the outside world.

Ok, that’s my Friday rant. Here, have a puppy.

P.S. I haven’t finished Season 7 yet, so DON’T YOU DARE TELL ME WHAT HAPPENS.

P.P.S. I’m still pretty happy therapists are on TV.

Mind Hacks: Solution-Focused Therapy {vlog}

It’s about time. You’ve read 50 Shades of Grey and now you know about Solution-Focused Therapy – the hot new (or not so new) approach to counseling.

This vlog was created to share some of what goes on in counseling. It’s not just me sitting there and nodding, I’m actually working and using a conceptual framework to fix the problem – always. For anyone who is curious what counseling looks like, how I use SFT, or really just wants to keep watching me in front of my shower curtain (yes, the cat is out of the bag… I live in a studio apartment with terrible lighting!) yet again, then watch this video.