Right before the move, I was writing and publishing blog posts like an animal. Well, an animal if the animal could type. Some sort of deranged monkey (or depending on your beliefs system, just a deranged evolved human), perhaps, could write as much as I was writing. I’d wake up early, make myself my breakfast and a coffee and I’d get crackin’. I had a long list in my phone of post ideas that would spontaneously come to me out of the clear blue sky, just “BAM!” and then genius (or my version of it) would be born. Fingers would type keys and I’d have a post finished in no time.
These days, the sky is not as giving as it once was with post ideas.
I don’t want to be the type of blogger who writes just to write, because I don’t want to subject anyone to the mindless ramblings of my life about my cat, my boyfriend, and my search for work. So, I just don’t write five days a week, and that’s OK. I’m cool with that.
Although, no I’m not! Where did my drive and creativity go? Where did all my musings on mental health and the mind vanish off to? It’s not like my brain has stopped working… I’m still thinking – a lot, actually. So what gives?
Well, while I was using the ol’ noggin of mine to think (as I often do), I began pondering about this conundrum and I think I have deduced what is ailing me on the creativity front. It’s not that my mind isn’t working, it’s that I’m not working.
I’m not one of those people (do they exist?) who conjure creativity simply from just existing. Sure, I am a creative being. I like to create very often, but my methods of creation are varied. I like cooking, painting, reading, writing, dancing, and the list goes on. Unfortunately, I often need a muse or a source of inspiration. Sure, I can dance like no one is watching, but usually I require a song to get the moves flowing. Same with this blog, I need inspiration.
I was working when I went on that tear of writing (I was also not distracted by Jesse‘s glorious presence as is known to happen on occasion, especially after 8 months of separation). My clients, my interactions with my co-workers, and the general environment of mental health practice kept the creative juices flowing quite liberally. So now, while I’m not sitting around idle, I am sitting around not counseling. That’s what this blog is about, the mind.
So the good news is that I got a job counseling! I’ll be working part-time (it’s better than nothing!) and hopefully stretching my skills and nourishing my creative side a bit more. I will also be hoping to find something more stable (and lucrative) as the months go on, but this is a start.
So, yeah. I’m looking forward to being inspired again.